An essay in unitard theory.

A lengthy article by Michael Chabon from The New Yorker explains why superheroes don’t translate to other mediums. Specifically, the costumes just don’t work in real life.

Every seam, every cobweb strand of duct-tape gum, every laddered fish-net stocking or visible ridge of underpants elastic—every stray mark, pulled thread, speck of dust—acts to spoil what is instantly revealed to have been, all along, an illusion.

He doesn’t mention Mystique’s “costume” from the X-Men flicks, which was just a couple of pasties and body paint. Well, she didn’t have any pulled threads on that thing. Maybe body paint is the way to go. That’s all that Dr. Manhattan wears, so we’ll see when the Watchmen get here.

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